This is a conversation that was had tonight between me and my step-mother-in-law:

HER: Are you sure you’re not having twins?

ME: Yeah, I’m sure.

HER: If you get any bigger you won’t be able to move around!

ME: Wow.

HER: Really! I don’t think I was that big even at the end of my pregnancies!

ME: (Silently walking away so she wouldn’t see me cry.)

This conversation really happened, in public, at a restaurant, at the end of an otherwise wonderful evening. I cried the whole 30 minute drive home. I have no idea how anyone would think it a good idea to say those things to a pregnant woman. To any woman, as my husband pointed out.

Yes, I’ve put on some weight. Sure, it’s about 10 pounds more than I should have by this point. But what the fuck? I just googled pictures of women that are 22 weeks pregnant, and some of them look a lot bigger than I do. Some of them are smaller, too. Honestly, I think I’m right about in the middle.

Until tonight I thought my burgeoning belly was cute. I’d admire it in the mirror. Now I feel fat. There’s nothing cute about fat.

Luckily I bought a treadmill last week. I can work on the weight gaining problem without freezing in the cold weather.

I’ve decided that I will not be going to her home for Christmas. I feel embarrassed, and would like to not have to see her until the baby is born and I am back at or under my pre-pregnancy weight. Obviously that probably won’t happen, but I can certainly try to keep my contact with such a negative person to a minimum. The stress that she brought me with those 3 simple sentences isn’t good for me, and is definitely bad for the baby.

Pregnancy is supposed to be a happy time. It’s going to take some work, but I’m hoping that I can get back to feeling happy and cute and everything that a first-time mom-to-be should be.

The Things People Say
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